Does passion end when commitment begins?

Does passion end when commitment begins?

That is the tag line in the latest Star cinema movie starring Aga Muhlach and Anne Curtis. Anne is Mich Valmonte (my middle name! what a coincidence), a young woman who meets Aga Muhlach in the wonderful island of Boracay where anything can happen. I'm sure you have an idea of the story. Something happens and then it's time to go back to Manila. The twist this time is that Mich is... well not exactly a commitment phobe but just would not prefer to be in a commitment.

I immediately saw myself in Anne's character. My old self I mean. (Disclaimer agad! Haha!) For the longest time I did not prefer being in a commitment. Yes I did go out on dates and I've had relationships but was never committed to anyone. The term we used before was "pseudo-relationships". I do not know exactly what it meant which made it more appealing for me at that time. Basta walang commitment. Period.

You might ask why. Well I thought kasi at that time that it will make things complicated. Mas fun pag walang commitment kasi no one would get hurt. I was trying to protect myself from being hurt, from crying over someone who left me or made a fool out of me.

Syempre now I learned I was wrong. Completely wrong.

After a lot of pseudo-relationships I finally realized that at the end of each one I would still cry. I could still feel the hurt. I thought that not saying you care for someone out loud would protect you from being hurt. But it did not.

This is the time that I wish I could say it's ok because I learned a lot from it. That I had to go through that before I can become who I am now. But sadly I cannot say that. Because I did not learn anything that my friends who chose to be in a commitment learned. And plus, it only left me bitter and insecure which takes longer to heal than the common broken heart.

It makes me sad when people my age say na I had to go through it muna. I have to enjoy life first before I settle down because it's part of growing up. It is not. Believe me it's not.
Three years ago I made that choice to finally commit to someone. And the Lord has been so good to me because He gave me THE ONE agad on the first try. That's why I'm entering a bigger commitment next year. ;)

I'm not a relationship expert but my answer to the above question is no. The passion will not end when commitment begins. If it ends, then it's not real. I believe it will only make things sweeter and more beautiful especially if it's from the Lord. And, when you both make a commitment to God to offer this to Him and make Him the center of it, it will even be more beautiful and full of passion.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I totally agree!!