on my way home

The US and I share this love-hate relationship ever since I was a kid. Until that time when I was 19 where we had this major fight that I decided this could never work out. I was denied of a tourist visa.

I tried to move on and got over that incident. But I guess I wasn’t able to do so completely. I hated people who think that going here would be the end of all their misery. Don’t get me wrong. I’m happy for those who come here but the attitude of some is what kinda pisses me off. I vowed never to set foot on that so-called land of milk and honey. I was bitter. Hahaha!

Two month ago though, as most of you have read in my previous blogs, I was offered by my company to go to the US for a series of trainings for a couple of weeks. Actually, I was ordered to go! (haha! Kidding) I didn’t know what to think or feel at that time. I suddenly remembered my relationship with the US. Now I know what to feel. I was hesitant of course. Oh no way. I’m not willing to go through that emotional roller coaster ride again. I was rejected once and I will never allow that to happen again. But then there was something inside me that was pushing me to go. I’ve heard a lot of stories from my friends. And most of them really do have a nice time everytime they go there. Plus, it’s not like I have a choice or something right? This is work you know. So there I was, the obedient child that I am, went through everything again. And argh it was awful! It was everything I had expeted it to be, except that this time I was allowed to visit under a business visa. I started to get excited after that. Excited and scared because I’m gonna be alone. This is my first to visit the US. Heck, my first time to go out of the country!

Well anyway, today is my last day and I was looking outside my hotel window feeling quite nostalgic. I can’t help but admit to myself how much I’ll be missing this place. It is not at all difficult to fall in love with this country. And I can’t blame those people who act as if they’ve been here all their lives when they’ve only been here for a month or two. I cannot even criticize anymore those people who would spend their whole lives in Manila planning and working to go here. It is indeed a nice place to start a family. You don’t have to be filthy rich to enjoy life. You can live comfortably as long as you have a job.
Yes, I would definitely want to go back. Any relationship has its ups and downs. And my relationship with the US is currently on its high. =)